Misreadings of the day

Wmmvrrvrrmm misread the BBC headline "Obama speaks to doctors on reform" as "Obama spanks the doctors on platform"

Wmmvrrvrrmm misread the BBC headline "Race to help India flood stranded" as "Rare help for Indian food stains"

Wmmvrrvrrmm misread the BBC headline "Freeze top public pay - Darling" as "Freezepop for public gay darling"

 

A bouquet of amorphous sea creatures

There is the fact that in the world of Facebook, Anne-Sophie mentioned she was croaking and someone offered to send her flowers, and then I thought of crocuses, and then suddenly that turned into the word crustaceans in my mind after Aétiene brought up the subject of certain people being compared to turtles and sandcrabs.

I keep imagining a bouquet of flowers that are slowly transforming into a variety of amorphous brightly coloured shellfish and might have to be placed in a tropical fish tank to keep them alive.

The terrible large lizard

• While waiting for a bus in my local town centre, imagining a gigantic shadowy tyrannosaurus rex running through a corridor made from the connected empty shells of all the nearby buildings, and this thing was spying on me through an open window and where it focused an eye on a nearby individual sitting on the bench where I was sitting and he began to transform into a lethal reptilian humanoid with a long muscular tongue. It would do this to another human and another human. A woman from India walking up the road transformed into a disk shaped thing with many arms and many heads sticking out of the side and she cartwheeled in my direction spinning past me as a very fast speed
  

• Wherever there were buildings made up from shops, flats, terraced houses and any houses that seemed to be very close together, this lethal creature would make it's path. Sometimes through a window one would see the tip of its tale or or one of it's large teeth.
  

• Eventually in my minds eye the vast creature escaped from the area by entering a large black vortex and disappearing. And during this time a man was chatting loudly to himself probably having the most important conversation in the world.

Misreading of the day

I misread the BBC news headlines "a male contraceptive jab could be as effective as the female pill" as "a fake detective job reveals the election of the female god"

Misreadings of the day

•  I misread the BBC News headline "Mexico to begin lifting flu curbs" as "Mexicans to begin living in cubes" which obviously must be what's going on in a parallel timeline where the swine flu didn't settle down resulting in the government there forcing further quarantine measures to be taken

•  I misread BBC News headline "Gaza patients questionings 'rise' " as "Greek Patisserie Guesthouse 'rave' " and really didn't have any clue about what that could mean in this universe or any other

• I misread in the BBC news article about the "Bang Bang Club" the picture caption "This time the fighters are firing blanks and lobbying polystyrene 'stones' " as "This time the fishers are fishing blackened polystyrene lobster clones" and felt very relieved about various things in life

Brief misindentification

Wmm briefly mistook the small shrubs in someone's front garden for grazing sheep

Misreading of the day

I misread "Demjanjuk loses deportation case" as "Demigod loses teleportation case" inspiring me to imagine an otherworldly visitor from another planet who carries a briefcase containing teleportation equipment and accidently leaves it in a telephone booth or by a park bench somewhere and of course I have the urge to search the streets for it everywhere because I so badly wants to travel the world by teleporting